Regret
by toolostforyou
Summary: Addison finds out Derek still has feelings for her but finds out in a way she didn't plan on. Addison and Derek. Lyrics are from Anna Nalick. I dont own anything. Please Review!


_And you'd be inclined to be mine for the taking_

_You're part of this terrible mess that I'm making_

Regret.

Addison Montgomery never regretted much in her life.

She never regretted marrying Derek, she never regretted letting Savvy be her main bridesmaid just to see if she would make-out with Mark who happened to be the best man. She never regretted walking in on Mark with the nurse because she knew that however hard he tried he would never change, even for her.

But she did regret a few things in her life, such as never having children, and the main one falling into bed with Mark and Derek walking in, even if Derek hadn't had walked in she still would have regretted it.

She thought if you regretted more things than you didn't you were weak, so how did she have a feeling she was going to regret this night. Maybe because she knew it was wrong to have ended up in the bed of her ex-husband, but what made it worse was that they were both naked. She could remember how they had got here. It started after a chat in Joe's with plenty of drink, then sharing a cab together and one thing lead to another and they ended up sleeping together. She couldn't understand how Derek could just sleep, he was with Meredith, and she was pleased that they had ended up in her hotel room and not in the trailer, but even though she wanted to get out of here she missed the feeling on Derek's arms around her waist, listening to his heartbeat and feeling his breath against her skin, it felt like home.

_You'll be the thing_

Stuck in her thoughts she never felt Derek wake up under her, she didn't feel him move until she felt his lips against her forehead, jumping slightly at the small show of affection that she didn't expect. Shifting her position she tried to untangle her legs from Derek and the sheets that were clinging to her body. Looking up at Derek, he showed no signs of regretting what happened last night, there was a lot of gossip going around about Meredith and Derek ending some time soon but she knew better than that because of she did, she would be about 6 months pregnant and it was Derek's baby and she would also be engaged to Mark at this moment and neither of them were true. Managing to untangle herself from the sheets and Derek she pulled one of the sheets around her, tugging at them she managed to pull them of the bed without showing anything to Derek.

"What are you doing?" He questioned her, slightly confused by it. "We were married for 11 years and going out for 3 years before that. I've seen you naked before." A smirk appeared on his lips something that Addison hated at times when she found this situation more than funny and something to joke about.

"What about Meredith? What about the divorce? Does it mean nothing to you? I was over you! This wasn't meant to happen! Its wrong, maybe it was good but it was wrong!" She started rambling of everything had could go wrong, every question that was going through her head.

"Addison."

The next thing she knew she was getting pulled back onto the bed, Derek instantly climbing on top of her tickling her at her sides trying to calm her down or at least get her off the whole subject, but then it hit him, she was never effected by this gesture but found it rather funny when she tried to push him off her but he instantly pinned her arms above her head, then tried the idea of pushing her hips against his which she had no chance of winning as she found out when she realised her was resting between her legs.

_You'll be the pain _

Giving up she let out an annoyed sigh; this only brought back memories of when they had just got married and everything was fun and games, but some how everything had turned out to be painful and they just ended up hurting each other, the little time they had together was spent arguing and now this. This was all so wrong, yet all so right at the same time. Her mind was telling her different things, her mind was telling her this was wrong to be turned on by this but her heart was telling her to go for it. She didn't know which one to side with because both had led her into trouble before.

She didn't know that she done it until she done it, her lips were upon his, tugging at his lip with her teeth. He was with Meredith right? No. She couldn't be thinking this now.

Pulling away she looked into Derek's eyes finding everything that was there those few years ago that felt like decades ago. "You broke up with Meredith didn't you?" All she needed was the slightest nod of Derek and that's what she got. Her lips back to attacking his, missing this. Hoping that they would never hurt each other ever again.

_Do you wanna go?_

_Still wanna go_

She couldn't believe she was getting married for the second time and to the same man. She had a different dress, but most things were the same they had gone back to New York, they went back to the same Church, had the same bridesmaids, same best man, same reception. Of course their vows were different they had written their own this time, more meaning than the normal ones. Everyone had told Addison that her's had been the most touching one but according to Derek everyone had said the same about his. They had spent their honeymoon in the same place, when the flew back to New York to get a flight back to New York the couple were stood in the queue for the check in.

"Do you want to go back?" Addison spoke up turning round in Derek's arms. The question had been playing on her mind the whole trip back. She wasn't sure if she wanted to go back to Seattle it held to many bad memories for her, but maybe that's what she needed. To get over the bad memories, but she didn't want to face them.

"Do you?" Derek gently kissed Addison's forehead, it felt good knowing that she was his again, no one else's. He didn't know he missed her until he lost her, till he ended it. Till he knew that 'Addison and Derek' were over. When he left New York he still had a place for her, that's why he never sent divorce papers to Addison and he didn't sign the one's he handed her. In the end he only signed them because he knew that he couldn't hurt Meredith, but he saw the pain in Addison, he couldn't stand watching her hurting, the woman he loved was hurting because of him, the love of his life was hurting, damn he would even say his Satan was hurting.

"I'm not sure. I wont miss the trailer." Addison let out a small laugh that had been her main complaint for weeks trying to get Derek to find a house or do something with the land. He grabbed her hand and pulled her out the line, she knew what he was doing they still had all their estates. She quickly kissed him on the cheek, happy that this was her life again. It just proved that absence makes the heart grow fonder.


End file.
